Tuesday, 30 May 2017

#MothersDay प्रियंवदा की भावनाए..

मेरा नाम प्रियंवदा पांडेय है और मैं एक शिक्षिका हूँ. मैं शिक्षिका होने के साथ-साथ एक बेटी, बहू, बहन और पत्नी के कर्तव्यो का पालन कर रही हूँ. परन्तु इन सभी रिश्तो से सबसे बाद में मिला रिश्ता मेरे लिए सबसे अनमोल और खास है. जिसे मैं इन सब रिश्तो से ज्यादा महत्व देती हूँ वो है मेरा रिश्ता मेरी बेटी आरोही के साथ. मैं माँ हूँ आरोही की. मुझे बेटों से कही अधिक बेटियाँ प्यारी है और ईश्वर ने मुझे एक साथ दो सुख दिए है, एक माँ बनने का सौभाग्य और दूसरा पुत्री देकर. आरोही को प्यार से गौरी भी बुलाते है सब. 


मैं एक कामकाजी महिला हूँ और अपनी नौकरी के साथ अपनी बेटी की भी जिम्मेदारी निभाती हूँ. जब पहली बार आरोही मेरे हाथ में आई तो लगा मेरे हाथो में सारी दुनिया की खुशिया समा गई. आज मेरी बेटी ३ वर्ष की हो रही है. स्वाद में नमकीन चीजे खाना, सच बोलना, खाना खाने में नाटक, हठीला पन, सभी आदते उसमे दिखती है जो मेरी भी थी. मेरी नन्ही परी मेरी परछाई है. अभी उसके पास किचेन सेट के बर्तन है जिनसे वो सारा दिन खेलती है. मुझे चाय बना कर देती है. मैं भी चाय पीने का नाटक करती हूँ. प्रशंसा भी करती हूँ कि चाय अच्छी है और उसके चेहरे के भाव देखने लायक होते है. खाने में दूध रोटी या दाल रोटी ही खाती है और पूछो "बेटा, क्या बना रही हो..?" तो मुस्करा कर कहती है "दूध रोटी".

मैं स्कूल से आने के बाद का सारा समय अपनी बेटी को ही देती हूँ. उसके जन्म के बाद मैंने प्राइवेट ट्यूशन देना बंद कर दिया. अपनी हॉबी क्लासेज भी छोड़ दी. क्यूकी मैं अपनी बेटी को पर्याप्त समय देना चाहती हूँ. मेरे पति इलाहाबाद में काम करते है और मैं अपने मायके में रहकर अपनी नौकरी के साथ आरोही को भी देख रही हूँ. आरोही को उसके नाना-नानी ही रखते है जब मैं स्कूल जाती हूँ. कभी-कभी जब मैं और उसकी नानी घर पर नहीं रहते तो वो बेचारी नाना के भरोसे रहती है. भूखी रहती है. मैं जल्दी पहुंच गई तो ठीक वरना १ बजे तक कुछ खाती नहीं है. उस वक्त मैं बहुत परेशान हो जाती हूँ. पर नौकरी भी ताक पर नहीं रख पाती. उस समय मेरी बेटी की एक खुराक कम हो जाती है जिसकी भरपाई कोई नहीं कर पता. तब लगता है मैं उसके साथ अन्याय कर रही हूँ. 

मुझे उसे माँ और पिता दोनों का ही प्यार देना होता है. कभी कभी सख्त भी होना पड़ता है. मैं अपने इस मातृत्व के सफर में अपने माता पिता को हमेशा याद रखूंगी. उनके बिना मेरा ये सफर अपूर्ण रहेगा. इसलिए मैं अपनी माँ तो विशेष रूप से आभार देती हूँ.  

#MothersDay A Message by ‎Shweta

माँ, समझ में ही नही आता कि शुरूवात कहाँ से करे क्यों कि शब्दों से ज्यादा भाव हैं इस शब्द में, जिसे सिर्फ़ महसूस किया जा सकता हैं। पूरी दुनिया छोटी लगती है माँ तेरे सामने..
जब हम छोटे थे, कोई भी परेशानी आती थी माँ सबसे पहले तेरी याद ही आती थी हर problem का solution था माँ के पास, बिन कहे भी वो हमारी हर परेशानी समझ जाती थी।
कितना सुकून था तेरी गोद में माँ..
माँ के लिए दुनिया में अपनी सन्तान से अच्छा कोई नहीं होता है। एक माँ ही का दिल इतना बड़ा होता है कि वो अपने बच्चों की गलतियों को माफ़ कर सकती है।
मेरी सारी गलतियों को वो माफ़ करती हैं !
बहुत गुस्सा होकर भी वो प्यार देती हैं....!
उसके होंठो पर हमेशा दुआ होती हैं...!
ऐसा करने वाली सिर्फ और सिर्फ हमारी माँ होती हैं!
आज मैं जब खुद एक माँ हूँ, माँ आप के लिये मेरा सम्मान और भी बढ़ गया है। आज मैं आप का प्यार, दुलार और आप की डांट सब समझ सकती हूँ कि आप की डांट में भी कितना प्यार छिपा रहता था।
मैं तुम्हें शब्दों में कैसे पिरोऊँ ......माँ
मेरी परिभाषा और पहचान हो ....तुम

Myths About Periods


Talking openly about periods is still a taboo in many societies. There is a lack of awareness and information about it. So, these myths continue to live on and are not questioned from one generation to another.

Have a look at some of the myths and facts behind them : 




FACT Menstrual outcome is just a harmless mixture of blood and tissue that was not used by your body to nourish a baby in the Womb. It's natural and very normal. This myth is often used to stop women from taking part in various religious events.


FACT : I feel this started when women used to take bath in open like in rivers or ponds. But now when most of us take bath in private bathrooms there is no place for such myth. Rather, it is a good idea to take a bath or a shower daily for a hygienic and clean body.


FACT: There is no fix formula to calculate when the ovulation will happen. Sometimes it  may occur before your period is over and sometimes it happens soon after. And in both cases, if there are sperms in the vagina, it is possible that the egg released during ovulation is fertilized making you pregnant.


FACT : For a healthy woman, menstruation doesn't cause any blood deficiency. Normally the blood loss during a period in healthy women is not more than 80ml (around 4 table spoons). If anyone notices more than this amount of blood loss, she should consult the doctor. 



FACT I can assure you, nothing happens when you touch pickles. They do not get spoiled. Rather, we can avoid eating pickles during periods. During periods, most of the women experience uncomfortable bloating. If they eat pickles during this time, their condition can get worse. 


FACTThat is only an average. Days in the menstrual cycle can vary from woman to woman. Your body will tell you what your cycle is, not other people.

Monday, 29 May 2017

#MothersDay The Unhappy Mothers Day! - A blog by Annu



Yes,you hear me right!Not this special day is special for everyone.Not this occasion brings happiness to everyone.

When everyone is sharing happiness of having a great mom or being a great mom on this Mother's Day,I would like to draw your attention to those who have not only never sensed such feeling but also have to be really strong on this day to keep themselves together.

I'm talking about the unfortunates who either don't have a mother they deserve or don't have her at all.While social media is all bloomed up with Happy Mother's Day messages,quotes and testimonials,if look around us we will find out there are people in society who :-
  • Were born orphans(Mother died during child birth)
  • Lost their mothers at a very young age
  • Lost their mothers due to her illness/accident/old age etc.
  • Are estranged from their mothers due to various issues like her mental illness ,one's own mental illness,family problems,misunderstandings,legal issues like divorce/custody,natural calamities etc.
  • Are physically connected but there are huge emotional wedges which cannot be worked out(like when mother is suffering from personality disorders like NPD,BPD,PTSD etc which makes a person extremely toxic and impossible to keep in touch with).
  • Other issues like mother being a criminal and serving in jail etc.

Not everyone is sleeping on the bed of roses as it seems on social network.There is huge social pressure to participate in the race that onsets on the days of such international festivals.Social networking occupies a very huge space of our daily lives,so much that it is almost impossible to keep moving without noticing its trends.

Mother is the most important person in one's life.The love that she can give to one's child is incomparable.  The comfort that a mother's lap the support that a mother's shoulder's can give cannot be found anywhere for any price. No extent of romantic or platonic love can replace motherly love.The trust that we can have in a real mother cannot be found anywhere.We all know this.Most of the fortunate ones are living lives with these luxuries of motherhood.But if someone says that they are deprived of it,then there is a very rare chance that they are lying.

As a society,instead of shaming them we should show them their support without being non judgemental and showing them compassion for they re lacking the basic human luxury that god granted to all living beings.Their pain is already too much to bear.We can definitely not fill the vacuum they have but giving them a listening ear on this day we can help them vent out.

We can be mothers to motherless.Motherhood is not just nine months of pregnancy rather its compassion for anyone who needs it.

Lets be compassionate for the one's going through "The Unhappy Mother's Day"

Sunday, 28 May 2017

How to Maintain Menstrual Hygiene

Menstrual hygiene and management is for ensuring that your everyday life is not interrupted by menstruation.It is to make that you can continue with your daily routine such as going to school, going to work or doing household chores. It can also prevent potential situations of embarrassment and in turn, make you feel confident about yourself and your body. To avoid any illness and infection it is important to maintain menstrual hygiene. In this sense, maintaining proper menstrual hygiene is important for your well-being and development.

Here are some ways to maintain good Menstrual hygiene :










Thursday, 25 May 2017

Thyroid, kinds and symptoms - A quick read

It's World Thyroid Day today. In my family, many of the elderly ladies are taking medication for Thyroid problem. When my mother was diagnosed with Thyroid, it was very late and taking medicine for life time was the only option left. This is a very common issue with ladies as they couldn't realize that the constant fatigue and mood swings can be the symptoms of Thyroid.

The thyroid gland, located just below the neck in front of larynx, secretes hormones through the bloodstream to every cell and every organ in our body. This tiny, 2-inch gland regulates our body temperature, keeps our brain thinking clearly, our heart pumping fine, and basically maintains harmony among all organs in our body. When one is suffering from Thyroid, this grand becomes either over productive or under productive. 

If the thyroid gland doesn’t secrete enough hormones into the blood, this is called Hypothyroidism. On the other side, if this grands secretes too many hormones, bodily functions will speed up, as it is hyperthyroidism. The symptoms of both the cases may be different. 

Initial symptoms of hypothyroidism might include:
  • Fatigue
  • Weight gain
  • Cold intolerance
  • Dry hair
  • Memory issue
  • Depression
  • High cholesterol
  • Slow heart rate
  • Constipation

Hyperthyroid symptoms could include:
  • Weight loss
  • Heat intolerance
  • Frequent bowel movements 
  • Nervousness
  • Thyroid gland enlargement
  • Sleep issues
  • Fatigue

A simple blood test can easily determine how much thyroid hormone one has in blood. But there could many other reason of tiredness and hair problems so people don't think towards getting Thyroid check and keep struggling with it. 

Risk factors of Thyroid :
  • Diabetes 
  • A history of radiation treatment to the thyroid area
  • A family history of thyroid 
  • Hormonal changes, such as those that occur in pregnancy or menopause
  • Gender: 80 percent of all thyroid cases are found in Women.
  • Age: Incidence of hypothyroidism is higher in menopausal women than in very young women.

Wednesday, 24 May 2017

The Surname Culture..

Almost all of us put a surname after our names and for many of us our surname becomes our identity before many around us like I am called as “pandey ji” by many of my friends and followers and even I call many people by their surnames. This surname is really helpful in some cases of identity making. The most helpful case with use of surname I have ever noted was when there were 4 girls named as Puja in our class and we used to recognize them as Puja Singh, Puja Awasthi, Puja Mittal and Puja Verma 😊. 


Despite such big help I have experienced, I find the surname culture really dividing and antagonistic. Afterall our surnames decide our casts and religion. I have noted people offering favors to surname-sake like Mishra ji is expected to help Mishra ji and Chopra ji expected to help Chopra ji. I have a facebook friend who bears the same surname as mine, following me on twitter, may seem to many people my close relative. People of same surname appear to fruits of same tree and thus others may be just others for them. Surnames are also symbols of status sometimes, when people address themselves as the son of great Oberoi family, and what to say when your name bears a surname that is common with an eminent personality like the Prime Minister. From Modi Sandal soap to Modi University, all have got their names re-polished with the popularity building of PM Modi. 

I also dislike this surname culture as we ladies are supposed to change our surnames after marriage. This is kind of unfair in my view. I mean why are ladies given any surname and they are supposed to change it later on. Anyways this is not mandatory by law so I have not attempted this. But otherwise it would have changed me from one person to another. 

I am not calling for an end of putting surnames, as I know this is kind of not possible, we have been using it for long and will keep using it for even longer. Phunsukh Wangdu and Ranchod das Chanchad could also have been not so entertaining then. But just imagine we have just names and no surnames. Just like flowers, Rose is Rose, Lavender is Lavender, Lotus is Lotus; not Rose Tiwari, Lavender Sharma or Lotus Dixit. Even Gods don’t bear any surnames; see Shiv ji is Shiv ji, Vishnu ji is Vishnu ji and despite being the son of Shiv ji, Ganesh ji has his own name and fame separate from his father Shiv ji. I believe this keeps their powers and mysticism isolated. One who has prayed Vishnu ji also prays to Goddess Laxmi separately and see she does not bear any surname carried by her husband. She has her own importance and powers, hence, it is important to keep her identity separate.  Though people relate Ram ji with Kshatriya cast and Krishna Ji with Yadav cast, we don’t take their names adding with any surname, Do we?

The surname is also determined by one of the parents, that is father’s name, for a child despite that mothers carry the child since conception, the surname is allotted on the paternal side. 

If we would ever become free from this surname culture, I believe a more united world is possible. More unity and less division means lesser differences and lesser conflicts. Lesser conflicts means more peace and more peace is good for all of us. Isn’t that?

तीजनबाई जी, पंडवानी की पहली महिला कलाकार

आज का लेख एक ऐसी कलाकार के नाम है जो महाभारत की जटिल कथा और इसके तमाम पात्रों को अपने चेहरे से बखूबी दर्शाती है. तीजनबाई जी . मैंने बचपन में पहली बार जब तीजनबाई जी की प्रस्तुति सुनी तभी से वो मेरे मन में बस गई. तीजनबाई जी छत्तीसगढ़ की लोकगायन शैली पंडवानी की गायिका हैं. जो लोग पंडवानी के बारे में नहीं जानते है उन्हें मैं ये बताना चाहती हूँ कि ये सिर्फ  गायन की शैली नहीं है, ये गायन और नाट्य दोनों की मिलीजुली शैली है. तीजनबाई जी इस शैली को अपनाने वाली पहली महिला है. इससे पहले पुरुष ही इस तरह से अपनी बात रखते थे.




तीजनबाई जी बताती है कि पंडवानी का मतलब है 'पांडवो की वानी', जिसे छत्तीसगढ़ के गाओं में गाया और सुनाया जाता है. तीजनबाई जी पंडवानी में पूरी महाभारत को अपनी आवाज में गाती है और साथ ही साथ अपने एकतारे के साथ भाव विभोर नाट्य प्रस्तुति देती है. वे स्वयं नायक भी होती हैं, नायिका भी, गायिका भी, निर्देशिका भी और अभिनेता भी. वो संवादों की लेखिका (मौखिक) भी हैं और उनके अनुकूल बनी पात्र भी बन जाती है. ये कला उन्होंने अपने नाना से सीखी. उनका एकतारा, जिसके साथ वो महाभारत का गान करती है, वो भी एक अलग पहचान रखता है. वो कभी कृष्ण की बासुरी तो कभी भीम की गदा बन जाता है. कभी तलवार तो कभी तीर तरकश बन जाता है. तीजनबाई जी अपने एकतारे के साथ ही अलग-अलग रूप लेती है. कभी भीम बनकर जोश से भरे छंद सुनाती है तो कभी द्रौपदी की व्यथा को दुखित मन से रखती है. महाभारत का एक-एक चरित्र वो खुद ही निभाती है.तीजनबाई जी के साथी कोरस में गाने वाले साजिंदे अपना एक विशेष महत्व रखते हैं. युद्ध की गर्जना और कोलाहल को सजीव बनाने में वे तीजनबाई के बहुत बड़े पूरक होते हैं.




तीजनबाई जी एक मशहूर कलाकार है जो विदेशो में भी अपने अनगिनत कार्यक्रम कर चुकी है. वो पद्म श्री और पद्म भूषण सम्मानों से अभिभूषित है. 61 साल की तीजनबाई जी आज एक अंतरराष्ट्रीय नाम है. पर जैसा की हमेशा होता है, एक छोटी सी जगह से आने वाली तीजनबाई जी को यहाँ तक आने में काफी कुछ झेलना और देखना पड़ा. लड़की होने की वजह से उनके गाना गाने को लोग पसंद नहीं करते थे. उनका ध्यान पंडवानी से हटाने के लिए उनकी माँ ने बहुत कुछ किया, उन्हें खाना नहीं देती थी, घर में बंद रखती थी पर तीजनबाई को कोई रोक नहीं पाया. वो कहती है कि "तीजनबाई जी नहीं पाती अगर वो पंडवानी नहीं गाती."

वो कहती हैं पहले की अपेक्षा अब सरकार और मीडिया ज्यादा से ज्यादा लोक कलाकारों को सामने ला रहे है. वो मानती है कि अपनी परंपरा बचाना, जीवन बचाने जैसा है. जो कलाएं गाओं तक सिमट गई है, वो पूरी दुनिआ में सुनी और देखी जाए इसके लिए वो काम कर रही हैं. पर उनकी सबसे अच्छी बात है कि वो बड़ी ही सीधी और हमेशा मुस्कुराने वाली शख़्सियत है. अमिताभ बच्चन को लम्बू के नाम से बुलाने वाली, तीजनबाई जी कहती है कि पुराने दिनों को कभी भूलना नहीं चाहिए. पुराना समय ही नए समय का महत्व बताता है. आज की अपनी प्रसिद्धि के साथ वो उस समय को याद करती रहती हैं जब उन्हें खाने में जली रोटी मिलती थी, जब उन्हें गांव से निकाल दिया गया था क्युकी उन्होंने गाना नहीं छोड़ा था. वो सच में एक मिसाल है कि चाहे कितनी भी परेशानियाँ आए, अपने सपनो को पूरा करना ही जीवन है.


Monday, 22 May 2017

Eleven things about child psychology a parents must understand

Have you even heard the quote of Haim Ginott that states “A child’s mind is like wet clay in potter’s hand”.. .



According to psychologists, the positive or negative attitude of a child is well developed during his or her childhood. The recent movie Dear Zindagi has also reaffirmed this. There are many instances where children complain that their parents don’t understand them. This may be serious issue or your child as his overall attitude, perception and thinking is based on this. Hence, all the responsible parents must understand their child’s psychology.

Here are eleven key points you must be aware to well understand your child’s psychology:


  • Children need to be attended; So always be there for your child.
  • Always give enough space but under gentle observation
  • Mind what your child has not said by understanding his body language, tone and gestures of your child.
  • Mind that Not every child has the same learning pattern
  • Understand your child’ emotional pattern
  • Help your child conquer his fear  
  • Children need to be motivated for new things in life so as to prevent resistance  
  • Being introvert is not a crime just help an introvert child how to express and become extrovert
  • Don’t ever overreact at your child’s mistake
  • Don’t load their minds with your expectations
  • Before assuming your child at the wrong, always try to step into his shoes. 


Following these tips from children psychology can prevent unnecessary misunderstandings between your and child at the same time make him ready to face the blunt realities of the outside world in his grown up life.  :)

“A man is what his mother makes him” Do you agree?


This mothers’ day, there have been a lot talks about mothers and motherhood. Meanwhile a start plus promo clip caught the attention and we noticed how a mother made his son learn how to care and respect women. (Watch the video at the end) 

If you have not watched it, let me tell you in this video a cute boy of 5 or 6 is sitting on the first seat in a bus while there comes a little girl with her mother. The mother of the boy vacates her seat to accommodate them and the little boy follows her mother by letting his seat to the famine duo. The clip tells us what and how much boys learn from their mothers when it comes to their way of treating another female in their lives. 

There was another picture message I noted a few years back in which a boy asks his mother how he can find the best women for himself. At this his mother replies, “instead of focusing on selection of best women, focus on being the best man.”

We know that family is the first school of a child. For a boy his mother is the first women he gets to know and understand. It is the mother who instill the qualities, like caring and respecting a women, in a boy. As a child a boy notes how a women puts deep efforts in taking care of others in the family, how much she works at home and outside home, how much she loves and how much she sacrifices for the sake of her family. Hence, the entire place of a women in a family is well understood by a boy as long as he grows up into a lad. This really has a deep impact on a boy’s attitude and perception towards a women. 

It is the mother who can make her boy understand the most sensitive questions of his life such as, what women like and how to become the dream man of a women. A mother instill emotions in a boy who are otherwise meant to be strong and least emotional. Most boys don’t express their emotions as openly as women do since they bear the responsibility of being stronger gender in the world. However, men can easily express emotions before their mother; they can cry, they can complain, they can express their fear and can also express their love before their mother without being shy about this. 

Thus, for a sustainable society that is free from disguise against women, we really need responsible mothers of boys as they have a key role in not only making them a successful man but also in making them a responsible loving a and caring partner.



Saturday, 20 May 2017

A women can be sexy even after marriage and having two kids..

Have you ever noticed how you had suddenly changed to 'anty' from ‘didi’ for the neighborhood children just after you got married? With no surprise you own the title ‘Anty’ forever after you become a mother.


The perception of people is not the only thing that changes we ladies from didi to an anty. Most women including myself themselves change their appearance after marriage and after having kids. We abandon jeans top and fit in kurtas and kurties. We inbox our funky jewelry and get on with the traditional earrings, rings and necklace. There are many more things we change and the most ridiculous thing we do is when we start listening to others. This hardly matters for you as an unmarried cool babe that you are wearing pink lipstick on a maroon dress; even if someone says that is not a match, you would have taught it’s the upcoming fashion with a wink. But after marriage and kids, we become a learner who can take advice from absolutely anyone. Even your house help Suneeta can comment on your way of wearing sari and you would ask her help in draping it on you.

Don’t you think it is a kind of insecurity we cuddle with after getting married and having kids that those most unfashionable sister-in-laws can tell you which lipstick suits on you?
Nothing as such changes in the universe when we change our marital status in office details. But we over absorb the heat.

There are hardly few women who dared to dream a comment like “hot and sexy” on their latest profile picture after she becomes a mother of two. However, my point is WHY?


Come out of the burden and believe me you can be sexy even after becoming a mother of two. After a couple of years we are married, we start being indifferent about how we are looking. Sometimes, even I think, it hardly matters I am allotted with my possible placement. This becomes a more serious negligence after we have kids. We get adjusted to the XL size and believe that jeans and single pieces don’t suit our sketch now. To give up hopes is the easiest thing to do and most of us do it. Though we like dresses, though we like to be in shape, we have practical mindsets and excuses that resist us from at least making the effort.

Come out of this resistance whenever you get time for yourself. After your kids are settled in their schedule, try hard to do the following things:

*   Have a look at the latest collection of dresses and jeans.

*   Try those dresses and get determined to gift yourself the right figure to fit in the one of your choice.
*  Make a healthy diet chart for yourself and set a timeline for expected figure.

I know many of you would have already tried to do follow this and have failed to manage with such resolutions. My advice is give it another shot and do a bit more this time.

First of all, “Remember that you are young and would be young forever” Secondly, “Stop restricting yourself due to what others will say”..

You are beautiful even of your weight is 70+ and have all the rights to feel beautiful so pamper yourself with bold eyeliner along with the dresses of your choice. If you think this looks shabby to others, wear them at home for yourself. And don’t forget you have to fit in that perfectly.


So what if you are a mother of two now, you can dress up the way you like, you have all the rights to look stunning and right to stay young at heart forever. Whatever be your biological age, feel young. There is nothing wrong in giving others a shock when they come to know that you are a mother of two and your inner happiness would get multiplied by a million when this actually happens with you. So just go on.  

Friday, 19 May 2017

गर्मी की छुट्टियाँ..तुम बहुत याद आती हो..

अभी कुछ दिनों पहले ही मैंने अपने बेटे के लिए एक वर्चुअल समर कैंप ज्वाइन किआ. ३० दिन के इस समर कैंप में ३० क्राफ्ट की एक्टिविटीज होगी और हर दिन बच्चो को कुछ न कुछ सीखने को मिलेगा. आज नौवाँ दिन है और मैं उफ़ करने को आ गई हूँ. रोज बेटे को एक्टिविटी के लिए बैठना, उसे समझाते हुए उस दिन का क्राफ्ट बनाना और फिर उसके साथ उसकी फोटो लेना. बड़ा मुश्किल है मुझसे पूछिए तो..ये २ से ३ साल के बच्चे सबसे ज्यादा चंचल होते है. एक जगह शांत होके बैठना उसके लिए बेकार की बात है. वो तो सबकुछ अपने हिसाब से चाहते है. अपने हिसाब से कागज काटना, रंग फैलाना, चीजे तोडना और जब कहो कि "बेटा थोड़ी देर सीधे खड़े हो जाओ.." वो और नहीं आपकी बात सुनते. मस्त है जीवन का ये समय भी.. कोई चिंता नहीं, कोई फ़िक्र नहीं बस आनंद ही आनंद...

अब जब ये समर कैंप शुरू हुआ है मुझे अपनी गर्मी की छुट्टियाँ याद आने लगी है. वो लगभग २ महीने कितने मौज के होते थे स्कूल के समय के. सारा साल बस इन्ही छुट्टियों की आस में कट जाता था और फिर जैसे ही लास्ट पेपर हुआ, मंसूबे बनने लगते थे कि क्या क्या करेंगे इन छुट्टियों में. लास्ट पेपर तो सच में पढ़ा भी नहीं जाता है बस छुट्टियों के सपने आते थे. फिर कुछ दिन दादी के यहाँ, नानी और मौसी के यहाँ जाते थे. सबसे अच्छी बात थी हम हरे-भरे और खुशहाल गॉंव जाते थे छुट्टियों में. वो रोडवेज की बस जिससे हम जाते थे, क्या मज़ा था उसमे सोते सोते जाने का. रास्ते में घर से लाए खीरे और फल खाना, फिर बार बार पापा से पूछना "कब आएगा मौसी का घर.." और पापा का बार बार वही जवाब देना "आने वाला है बस.." जैसे ही गॉंव की पगडण्डी दिखती, ख़ुशी मानो फूट फूट कर निकलती सब तरफ से.. और बस फिर कुछ दिन के लिए भूल जाते थे शहर को अपने..
सुबह जल्दी उठना और उठ कर बाग़ से आए आमों से अपने अच्छे आम अलग करना. फिर बाबा के साथ खेत पर जाना और सुबह की ठंडी हवा का मज़ा लेना. खेत से अपने मन के खीरे और खरबूजे तोडना. कुछ वही खाना और बाकी घर के लिए इकठ्ठे करना. मन किआ तो खेत के टूबवेल में ही नहाना.. स्विमिंग पूल से कम नहीं था कही से भी वो. फिर घर वापस आते समय फुलवारी से फूल चुनना. बाबा खेत से आकर नहा कर पूजा करते थे, और हम बच्चे बस पूजा ख़त्म होने का इंतजार. उसके बाद जो मीठे पारे मिलते थे प्रशाद में वो किसी मॅहगी टॉफ़ी के टक्कर के थे. फिर हम खाना खाते, नास्ता तो खेत पर ही हो जाता था. इतना सब होते होते बस १०:३० बजता था सुबह का. फिर मौसी के हाथ का दाल चावल.. वाह क्या स्वाद था उनके हाथ में.. अब बारी आती आम की. सुबह जो आम अलग किए थे वो खाए जाते थे. बाबा एक कहावत कहते थे कि.."जब तक आम खाते-खाते दाढ़ी (chin) तक छिलके न लग जाए तब तक आम क्या खाया.." खैर, इतने आम कभी खाए नहीं गए..
दोपहर में सब सोते और हम बच्चे खेलते. धूप तब या तो तेज नहीं होती थी या हमें महसूस नहीं होती थी. ३ बजे बाबा चाय पीते थे तो हम बच्चो को बड़ा मज़ा आता था अंगीठी में चाय बनाने का, वो भी केतली में. शाम को फिर शिवाले पर हो-हल्ला आस पास के बच्चो के साथ और फिर ७ बजे शाम के गायत्री जी की आरती होती थी घर के ही मंदिर में. रात बड़ी जल्दी हो जाती है गॉंव में. ८ बजे खाना खा के सब निढाल हो जाते थे अपने अपने बिस्तरों पर. नींद भी बड़ी जल्दी आती थी थके जो रहते थे सब..
एक अजीब सा जादू दिखाते थे बाबा रात में. आंगन में लगे पेड़ हिलते थे रात में हवा से, तो वो कभी बोलते "देखो ये आज राधा कृष्ण बने हैं दोनों पेड़.." और हम बच्चो को सच में राधा कृष्ण से लगने लगते थे वो. कभी कहते "आज ये पैंट-शर्ट और टोपी पहने एक आदमी और दूसरी उसके साथ साडी में कोई औरत हैं.." और पता नहीं कैसे हमे उस दिन वो आदमी-औरत लगने लगते थे दोनों पेड़.. उन पेडों को देखते देखते ही आँख लग जाती थी.. और बस सुबह कब आ जाती पता ही नहीं चलता..
छुट्टियाँ कब बीत जाती,समझ नहीं आता था और वापस आकर बस हॉलिडे होमवर्क दिखाई देता. पूरी छुट्टियों में तो कुछ किआ नहीं होता था तो एक हफ्ते में युद्ध स्तर पर हॉलिडे होमवर्क पूरा किआ जाता. सच कहू तो आज कल के समर कैंप कुछ भी नहीं है हमारे बचपन की छुट्टियों के आगे. हर बार कुछ नया सीखते थे हम. कभी पेड़ पर चढ़ना, कभी कुए से पानी निकालना, कभी चूल्हे पर खाना बनाना तो कभी पत्थर मार कर आम तोडना. कोई आज का समर कैंप ये नहीं सिखाता और न ही सिखा सकता है.. पेड़ ही कहा है शहरो में आम के ऐसे कि उनसे पत्थर मार कर आम तोड़े जा सके.
बड़ी याद आती हैं बचपन वाली गर्मी की छुट्टियाँ, या यूँ कहू कि गॉंव वाली छुट्टियाँ.. जब टीवी नहीं था, फ़ोन नहीं था, कंप्यूटर नहीं था पर मज़ा बड़ा था.. मेरे बेटे को भी ऐसी छुट्टियों का एहसास हो, मेरी कोशिश जरूर रहेगी..उसे अपने गॉंव जरूर ले जाउंगी मैं जहाँ स्मार्ट डिवाइस नहीं होंगे लेकिन परम निर्मल आनंद भरपूर होगा..

Thursday, 18 May 2017

Where We Are Heading As A Society?

Do you also think, we as a society, have turned quite inhuman and vicious?  At-least I think so, and I am in much distress after witnessing this everyday increase in number of dreadful rape incidents. A few days back, the body of a 23-year-old girl was found at a secluded place in Rohtak, Haryana. As per reports, the girl was sedated and gang raped. Medical examination unfolded that she had been violated with some foreign objects. Her head was smashed with a brick to blur identification and the body was run over by a vehicle. Our so-called high tech news channels ran this story as Haryana's Nirbhaya but I found it least appreciable way of reporting such a hateful crime incident.

Somehow I lived with this news. But what is not letting me live is the fear of where we are leading towards. Even after the death sentence to the accused in Delhi’s Nirbhaya case, there is no decrease in number of such brutal crimes. In this deep anger, I said to my husband, “I think we could live better life had there been reporting or no IT broadcasting of such crime on news, supposedly, the criminals would be leaving the rape victims alive believing that there would be no reporting against them for what they have done.” Victims, as I believe, are afraid of reports and media broadcast of their crime which induces them to become a monster and brutally slaughter the victim before there take places any reporting. More attentiveness towards women safety has made the media alert and the media pressure has made the police reporting of maximum cases possible. The women are also bold enough today to report the case without fear or shame. Though, this is not acceptable for these barbaric criminals who put their best efforts in in taking the victim to such a condition that they are not at all able to fight back. They put their best effort in killing the girl after rape. No matter what is the age of victim!
Now another news that broke my heart and made me getting a lump in my throat was a 10-year-old girl who was turned pregnant by her stepfather. This again happened in Rohtak, Haryana. The agony came to light when her mother took the girl to a local government hospital where after examination doctors diagnosed the young girl to be 5 months pregnant. According to news, this little girl was repeatedly raped by her stepfather. The man allegedly threatened the girl to not to tell anyone. The young little girl is between life and death now as the Doctors are not sure about the success of her abortion in such critical condition. However, the completely immature body of a 10 year old is also absolutely not able to carry this for a long time.
The law considers it illegal to abort a pregnancy after 20 weeks, it is totally not possible for a poor ten year old to survive this. Just the heights of the insane mentality of her stepfather is going to cost the little girl her entire life. The girl is still admitted and the medical board of Rohtak's Post-Graduate Institute of Medical Sciences will meet today to decide on the child's condition.
I become emotional or you can say I am quite sentimental over what is going on these days and what our girls are going to live like. A 10 year old girl is bearing so much pain and physical discomfort. During my initial days of pregnancy, I used to curse morning sickness and other changes that were happening in my body. There was support from all the sides and then only I survived that tough time. During my chat with my friend, I was thinking what that girl might have gone through, she is five months pregnant now!! 
I am simply thoughtless about the man. Is he an animal? He has a wife to have sex with, however, he raped an adolescent who is her daughter. How can someone be so felonious and mentally obsessed that he raped a child, repeatedly?  He made a little girl suffer this way, carrying an unborn fetus and struggling for her own life. Although the man has been arrested but I think no punishment can make him realize what he had done so shamelessly.
I don’t care what law is saying, but I want doctors to abort this pregnancy for her. She is still to live her childhood. I want the girl to be safe and back to her normal physical state. How come she can be a mother in such innocent age, she is so small!! Mare thinking about the future if she is not allowed to abort the fetus gives me heavy sadness. God help her and help her sail through this time. Give her good health and strength to pass through it. 
This is such a shame as a society. One of the two most honest relationships of a child's life, a father, has raped the daughter.  I don’t understand where we are heading. Will we ever be able to make our surroundings livable for girls? BIG QUESTION.

Tuesday, 16 May 2017

#MothersDay The decision to become a ‘sitting at home Mother’ - A blog by Manjari

I would not hesitate in saying that there has been a culture of women forsaking their jobs after they become a mother of someone to be taken care of at their home. This is also a bitter fact that no mother has a choice when her young one is expecting her presence at home and she has to be out at work. On this mothers’ day I am dedicating my deep thoughts to all those women who had given up their career a few years back for the right up-bringing of their children. This was my mom too.



I had a chance to read an article of Victoria Beckham where she explained her feelings of trouble while leaving her children at home when she was out of country for work. She is wife of David Beckham and a model turned renowned designer herself who is a mother of three lovely kids. She said she felt guilty of not being able to be with her kids when they were babies and needed their mother the most. Though she thinks she had to be strong and leave her kids at home under the service of care takers.

Women have conquered a lot of hurdles in their journey of making their presence at every work place. This made them face conservative social mindset, stand against their family and prove themselves efficient enough to manage work and household responsibilities both. However, there is one thing that still makes women sacrifice their career and there are many who have to give up their designation when it comes to be with their child at home.
A women has n number of roles to perform in her life right from being a daughter to being a wife a mother and supposedly a grandmother too. In the consequences when is becomes a mother she is responsible for complete making up of a completely novel soul for this universe, unlike her other roles. She not only gives birth to a child, she has to ensure the child is healthy, happy and efficient enough to lead the world. And every women knows this is not an easy task. This is ever challenging for a working mother who has to afford a break from her career to ensure she is there for her child all the time as long as required.

This is a clear frustration when a women has to give up her designation and career and start pursuing a dependent life even after being efficient and talented enough to conquer the zenith. A gap of some five year is the least required as per the views I have collected from my friends who are or have been in similar situation.
Mothers’ day is not over for the mothers who have sacrificed their career for the right up-bringing of their children. It lasts for the entire year in their thoughts, plans, wishes, deeds, acts, moves and breaks too. You are often not appreciated as much as you should be. You are often made to silent your wishes and devote entirely in the making up of the wishes of your children. This is not an easy to manage life as the children would soon become big enough and you might feel abandoned at home with least importance showered and most free time in hand. When children start closing their room before you its Start Caring about Yourself Back. Just don’t wait for anyone else to praise you for what all you have done for others. Pamper yourself, appreciate yourself and get your attention back on yourself.

Monday, 15 May 2017

#MothersDay - A Timeless Journey - A blog by Pallavi

“Wake up Mumma…I am done with my sleep…it’s time to play!!” This should be music to the ears at any time of the day with a toddler, but at 2 am in the night you simply wish that you are hearing it in a dream.


Although the past three years of motherhood have been nothing short of a dream, the sleepy and dreamy nights have simply vanished and are a very rare occurrence. Instead as a mum I have realized the importance of power naps, the importance of syncing your needs with the expectations and needs of your little one and finally the importance of giving it all to the most important part of your new life.

Life has amazingly traveled a complete cycle for a little girl from a little city. When I started growing up, I was a unit of a family and the entire school and college life was spent struggling hard to etch out an individual identity, in search of a confident and unique entity to stand out among the crowd. Even after marriage, while I started sharing my life and its special moments with my partner, there was still a strong urge to retain that individualistic identity which I had built all through these years. Just as Aarsh was born, the fierce struggle simply melted away in the deluge of love, emotions and ecstasy and that little girl was again sharing her identity with the little one who had just arrived on the planet and building a completely new world centered around the waves of laughter, shrill cries and the never ending list of to-dos and donts!!

Growing up once more with the little one has its own challenges and the pace has to be simply exact so that none of us outgrow each other. Life also holds it special surprises when I see the little baby who spends almost the entire day getting his basic training from me, walking, talking and even sleeping like his dad does!! This has made me realize the importance of the multiple roles the parents, in a nuclear family, play in a toddler’s life. Till a kid goes to school, we play the roles of a friend, soul-mate, mentor, guide and also his hero, swapping the roles with each other according to the availability of time and our personal and official schedule. It is best left to the little one which traits he wants to take up from whom and time and experience has taught me, that when left to himself and provided with the right options, the baby always is the best to judge what is most suited for him.

With the passage of time all these emotions and experiences of the initial years will be consigned to the photo albums to look back upon for Aarsh, but to memories for both parents, memories to live, love and cherish for the rest of our lives!!

How I celebrated Mother’s Day this time..

We just celebrated Mother’s Day. I am hoping we, mothers, had a blast of the day. I thought to write how I and my tot celebrated this Mother’s Day because this time it was different. 

A day before, on Saturday night, I requested my husband “NO More comments tomorrow, please”. He laughed and said, “How that is possible?..” I left it over him and slept peacefully looking forward to next day. The Mother’s Day.
I got up with the heed of juggling with the washing machine. But after lying on the bed of the next room, I said to myself “It’s Mother’s Day today. It’s for me. I should enjoy every minute of this day”. I postponed washing clothes and slept again. At 9 ‘clock, my mother called and I wished her. With my first line, she could comprehend that I was sleeping so next minute only she said “Sleep now. We’ll talk in evening.” And I closed my eyes again, aiming to sleep for some more time. However, with the hope to wish everyone on my FB page, I got up. It was another nice thing happened that my son was sleeping deep and this gave to a good ME time. I completed my kitchen chores and after daily prayers, I gave an enjoying span to myself with surfing internet. When my boy woke up, we did something super amazing.

video


Last week, we mother and son made two Mother’s Day card as per my boy’s craft activity. We gave those cards to two special mothers, our neighborhood Moms. To be honest, my son is half raised up by our kind neighbors. He is going to them since he was hardly 7 months old. One of them, Vandna ji used to take care of him like a mother. At times, she bathed him, fed him and made him sleep in my absence. She was my go-to person if I needed to go market or hospital. I used to give Vandna ji a diaper and my boy’s clothes and she happily took care of my little one for hours. My son equally loves Vandna ji and her family, especially her daughter. I also have so much respect for the family in my heart. My other neighbor, my flat owners, are also very close to my son. These days, as a routine, my son does his dinner with them. He loves Aunty’s food and like his family member, he straightaway asks Aunty to make Paratha for him. After reaching home from his daycare, my boy looks for a chance to peep inside their house and whenever he gets a green signal from Uncle, he immediately runs inside.

This Mother’s day, my son gave his hand made cards to these two lovely ladies. Both the ladies now have grown up kids and they didn’t have that excitement for Mother’s Day as my toddler had. So when my boy gave them cards with saying “Happy Mother’s Day”, I saw immense love in their eyes. Both were so touched by the gesture of my 3-year-old. I was so relieved and happy in my heart, that I was able to give some happiness to two of the best mothers.

Other than this, my husband took us, me and his son, for an outing. We ate at MacD and came back home with a happy meal toy. I made sure to cook a delicious Kheer for my husband as it’s his favorite. I also made my boy’s favorite Papad which he ate with so much of elation. A confession, I had decided to not cook this day but I couldn't resist myself making my husband’s and my son’s favorite things.

At evening, when I went to Vandna ji for giving a bowl of Kheer, I saw the card, perfectly placed in their living room’s cabinet. She told me that it’s great that my boy has an interest in art. She wished him a good life. I was a bit poignant then. 

I feel it was a perfect Mother’s Day. I made my boy happy. I also made my husband happy (okay not much, but a bit). But above all, I could make two lovely mothers happy who are simply awesome and motherly love my boy. 

Sunday, 14 May 2017

#MothersDay माँ..ईश्वर की खूबसूरत नियामत


मुझे बचपन में दूध बिल्कुल पसंद नहीं था अपनी माँ की तरह। माँ जबरदस्ती एक गिलास दूध हम चारों भाई बहनों को देती थी। मेरी दादी भी हमारे साथ रहती थी। उन्हें दूध और दही बहुत पसंद था तो वो सुबह शाम इसके मजे लेती थी। मेरे पापा को खाने के आखिर में थोड़ा सा चावल दूध और चीनी के साथ खाना बहुत रहा। माँ को उनकी जबरदस्ती के लिए बहुत उलाहना देती थी मैं।

मेरी शादी के बाद जब मेरे माँ पापा पहली बार मेरे पास आये तो मैंने ख़ालिस दूध की चाय बनायी। माँ खुश हो गयी। दोपहर के खाने में मैंने दही भी परोसी। पापा, अपने पति और अपने लिए कटोरी भर दही और माँ के लिए थोड़ी सी। मेरे पति बोले ‘मम्मी जी के लिए बस इतनी सी दही’! मैंने गर्व से अपना ज्ञान झाड़ा ‘मम्मी को दही पसंद नहीं है’। इस पर पापा बोले ‘नहीं बेटा, मम्मी को तो सुबह शाम दही चाहिये’। मैंने हैरानी से माँ की तरफ देखा और माँ बस मुस्कुरा दी।
मैंने बाद में अकेले में माँ से पूछा ’अब तुम्हें दही पसंद आने लगी?’ माँ ने कहा ‘बेटा, दही तो मुझे हमेशा से पसंद थी। लेकिन चार बच्चे, तुम्हारी दादी और पापा के लिए कहीं कम न पड़ जाए इसलिए मैं नहीं खाती थी। तब पापा की तनख्वाह भी कम थी। केवल दादी को शुद्ध दूध मिलता था। तुम लोगों के दूध में तो आधा दूध और आधा पानी होता था। ऐसे मैं मेरा मन नहीं मानता था कि खुद दूध दही में हिस्सेदारी करके तुम लोगों का हिस्सा कम करूँ।‘ मैं उस समय कैसा महसूस कर रही थी यह लिखना संभव नहीं है मेरे लिए। आँखों में आँसू झिलमिला गए मेरे और अचानक माँ को दिए अपने सारे उलाहने कानों में गूँज गए। क्यूंकि जब से जॉब शुरू की मैंने सुबह का नाश्ता सिर्फ़ दूध ही होता है। मैं हैरान होती थी कि दूध मुझे पसंद कैसे आ जाता है! इस दूध में आधा पानी जो नहीं होता था यह बात आज समझ आई।
यह समझ आया कि कैसे माँ सीमित साधनों में अपने बच्चों की हर ज़रुरत पूरी करने की कोशिश करती है। कैसे माँ सालों तक बच्चों को वहम में रख सकती है! बमुश्किल मैंने आँसू रोककर पूछा ‘अब तुम दूध भी पीती हो?’ माँ ने कहा ‘हाँ, रात को सोने से पहले एक गिलास पी लेती हूँ’। मैं माँ से लिपट गयी क्यूंकि अब मुझसे मेरे आँसू नहीं रुक रहे थे। माँ से लिपट कर मैं सोच रही थी न जाने और क्या क्या बातें हैं जो मैं माँ के बारे में नहीं जानती। पता नहीं कौन कौन सी इच्छायें और शौक उन्होंने अपने अन्दर ही मार डाले और किसी को पता भी नहीं चलने दिया। मेरे लिए यह मातृत्व का एक पहलू है जो मैने उस दिन जाना। पूरी तरह तो शायद कोई भी माँ या उसके मातृत्व को बूझ ही नहीं सकता। माँ और मातृत्व ईश्वर की वो खूबसूरत नियामत हैं जो इस दुनिया को अपने अथाह प्रेम से सींचती आ रही हैं।
~ हेमा